Saturday, January 24, 2015
What It Means To Be A Sinner
My heart hurts for all the mistakes I've made. I'm sad that I feel like I've disappointed God. That my focus should be on him and what he wants for me, but it's on things. I know he is here. He's been with me all my life, but I can't hear him. I can't get the evil out my head sometime. I feel trapped a lot and a disappointment. It's so hard to get back emotionally and mentally to were I'd like to be. I want to be happy. I need to be happy and I don't listen. True happiness comes from God. I wonder if what I want and what God wants is one in the same? Sometimes I think he wants me to do what he wants. Or maybe it's just hard to do what I know I should. I'm so confused. I think others get confused about God and just give up on him and sometime life. I've seen the blessings in my life and I don't want to give up. I want to get it right. If I am a sinner can I ever get it right? Right is doing what I know and feel in my soul and in my heart. I will always make mistakes and I will never be perfect, that's what it means to be a sinner.