Day 33. Today, I was my own worst enemy. I always say that no one can make me feel as worse as I can make myself feel. I set up standards and when I fall short, taking a risk, and I know the outcome, but think things will go differently and they don't....geez, I feel I let myself down. I should have known better. Suffering the consequences of something that I knew was going to turn out bad is the ultimate, worse feeling. I had to allow myself to go through the mental beat down. Once I allowed that to occur, I remembered that everyone does something stupid and that I would make better choices next time. The blessing is that I have the rest of the day to do things differently and to make better choices. I am learning that I have to take it easy on myself....I'm only human!
What's on my mind. Loving myself. I know it's not Friday, but really, how often do we take time to LOVE ourselve? We get busy working, paying bills, taking care of others. We need to take time out for ourselves. I beat myself up so much that I should be loving myself just as much or even more. Loving myself means being happy with who I am. I could be worse and I could be better. I am working daily to be better, but for today I am going to be happy with who I am. I really need to take more positive risk then the stupid ones. Does anyone out there just take a leap of faith and do something crazy that is a positive risk? I guess I do, but the trick is to continue until it falls through. It's like fishing. You keep fishing until you catch one. I am going to keep jumping until I catch one. I was just telling someone how silly it is to continue making the same mistake over and over again, and then I do it. That is why it is so imperative not to judge someone else for the things they do. The challenge today is to love yourself, give yourself a hug (I know it sounds corney) just do it. While you are at it take a positive risk. You are bound to love yourself more for even trying. Today I will leave you with an inspiration quote.
You’ll learn, as you get older, that rules are made to be broken. Be bold enough to live life on your terms, and never, ever apologize for it. Go against the grain, refuse to conform, take the road less traveled instead of the well-beaten path. Laugh in the face of adversity, and leap before you look. Dance as though EVERYBODY is watching. March to the beat of your own drummer. And stubbornly refuse to fit in. -Mandy Hale, The Single Woman: Life, Love, and a Dash of Sass